'Malcolm's Question'
A Short and Funny Story

This is a short and funny story about Malcolm, one of those unique bush characters, the town drunk and the giver of some hilarious funny stories.

Growing up in the outback of Australia you meet a lot of unique characters and hear a lot of funny stories as well as being witness to some hilarious situations

Our Mother was a member of the CWA (Country Women's Association) and she used to go to the monthly meetings in Tibooburra at the CWA Hall.

It was quite a treat to have a guest speaker and our memory recalls an hilarious incident that occurred at one of the monthly meetings.

All the women had gathered from far and wide to listen to a lady who had travelled from Sydney as special guest speaker.

With cups of tea and cake in hand the women of the bush all sat around for the expectant speech.

Unbeknowns to the gathered ladies the old town drunk, Malcolm, had wandered in and was standing up against the door frame at the back of the hall (so he would not fall on his face)

The guest speaker stood on the stage and started "Can any of you ladies tell me what pain is more shocking and painful than the pain of child birth?"

And as the guest speaker paused to draw breath and to continue in this vein, Malcolm yelled out "Lady have you ever been kicked in the balls?"

Well Mother said the speaker nearly fell head first off the stage and the bush women just fell about in peals of laughter, that sort of comment didn't faze them one bit.

The lady from Sydney was totally mortified and never quite finished her speech about "the pain of childbirth"

This short and funny story did the rounds at parties and gatherings at the pub for years.

Poor old Malcolm didn't think it was even an unrealistic question to ask.